Like grandmother, like mother, like daughter

I grew up with a mother who did everything and anything to try and lose weight. From a very very young age, I can remember my mom taking diet pills, eating differently, and constantly pointing out all her flaws. I also remember similar encounters when I would visit and stay at my grandmothers house. She wouldn't eat bread, she drank a special milk, and took diet pills just like my mother. The difference though, my grandmother was thin and my mother was fat.

But my mother wasn't always fat. As a young girl and teenager, my mother was tall and skinny. After having two kids, her body changed and her weight changed. Since then, for as long as I can remember, my mother has tried anything and everything (except surgery) to try and lose/maintain her weight. My mother's weight fluctuated from being fat to being not as fat, she never got back to being skinny. My grandmother would comment on her weight though, not always, but enough that I noticed.

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When I was younger, I was considered fat for my age. In 7th grade I moved in with my father and went to a new school and made new friends. I met a girl who was skinnier than me, and guess what, she took diet pills. I never took diet pills, but within a year or so, I started getting conscious about my weight. And so did my father and mother. I thought I was fine, but I would hear comments like "you're eating too much" or "you're not eating enough". No one was ever happy with my weight and someone would always comment about it. I remember one summer in high school, I went the entire summer barely eating a thing. I lost a lot of weight and got sick. My mother would congratulate me when I ate, even if it was just a little bit. I had to slowly consume more while eating because my stomach and appetite shrank from not eating anything. Eventually I got my appetite back and maintained a healthy weight. Years later, I had a beautiful baby boy and my body completely changed. I suffered for months with being uncomfortable with my new "mom bod". I didn't learn to love my body until just a year ago.

There's such a negative shame behind being fat. And for what? Because the advertisement in a magazine told you so, because a commercial showed you some crazy weight-loss results and showed you how happy the people seemed after the weight-loss, because you've heard someone say "don't eat that you'll get fat". But why is FAT the concern when it comes to bodies? Why not the health attached to that body? Just because someone is skinny doesn't mean they are healthy and just because someone is fat does not mean they are unhealthy. You CAN be FAT and HAPPY and HEALTHY.
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